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You’ve been through a lot, so the mental gymnastics that work out with our emotions will be popping up. For any of us; when we go through tough stuff; I think especially as we move into the mature years of our life (at least for me); and have more limitations in ways physically; we can be overcome. You sound like you know what hinders you in these ways as you seek to gain and use your physical abilities. Write it out; read it; remind yourself how to work through or around the hindrances; and walk out daily a path toward your goals. The speed of recovery or progress is not what is most important. Keep moving toward them. Involve what support system you can. The best to you Loraine. You are thought of and prayed for. Keep well; and keep on truckin’.