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Frustration setting in
So I’ve been at it for a couple of week, still working on the first couple of lessons in 30 Days to Play and I feel like I’m really not making any progress. I feel like my fretting hand doesn’t want to cooperate and, truth be told, I feel like the guitar sits what I can only describe as too high in my lap. I don’t want to give up but it really doesn’t feel like much is going as it should. Any advice?
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12 Replies
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My sister, @Sis_di, is going through the same 30 Days and finds herself stuck too. Well… perhaps try a classical stance with your foot on a box or raised so the body can be lower. It is actually more comfortable and ergonomically correct. That’s only a part of the concern. Mostly I’d say relaxed and have fun with it. Don’t feel like you have to master a lesson. Just move on and stay consistent with the 10 minutes. You can always come back but the lessons build skills and are not stacked so that you can’t learn later lessons because you haven’t mastered the former. I have a lesson for a Mississippi John Hurt style technique I’ve been coming back to for two years off and on and still don’t feel good about it. Any percussive type lesson I struggle with. Find a two chord song you like and play that. The 12 chord blues is only 3 chords. Most songs are! Trust the process (10 minutes) and enjoy the journey. The result is a serendipity.
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Frustration happens to even the most experienced players. If you find yourself getting frustrated or discouraged out the guitar down and take a break. Just make sure you come back!
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Hi @Danny75 , frustration was my biggest obstacle I had to address in order for me to progress on my guitar journey. You said you were not making any progress. Is that an accurate observation? or do you know more today than when you started? Are you actually making progress, slowly, little bits at a time? You have begun a training regiment of both mind and body. These two things do not always progress equally and simultaneously. If we take out the notion of how it “should” go and focus and analyse how it “is” most off the frustration will dissipate. If at the end of each session you can analyse what you have accomplished during the lesson, even if it is just time on the strings, you will advantage yourself for faster improvement. Hats off to you for coming to the forum with the roadblock! It is an important part of the process as well. It is essential to have goals but it is also imperative to not overestimate your learning curve with out really knowing what it is. Now that you have a couple of weeks down, you can compare week one to week four, etc. Improvements can be very small at times but recognizing these small improvements is how we become the player of our desire. For me this did not happen over night but rather over time. Relax, have some fun every time you pick up you guitar. Even if it is only playing one chord to your liking, or making one (chord) change accurately and precisely , or three notes perfectly to you liking.
That is the general: now to specifics. What exactly are you working on? What is your specific physical (or mental) hurdle you are working through at the moment? Knowing this we may be able to find some solutions to get you down the path on this amazing journey we call learning to play.-
Specially, something as simple as fretting the same string alternately with my index and ring fingers has proven challenging. It’s as if my hand is screaming at me that it’s not a natural motion and doesn’t want to cooperate. I’ve experienced discomfort in my left hand for years now and whatever is going on in there might be contributing to my fretting woes possibly. Maybe it’s a matter of continuing to use muscles, tendons, and ligaments that I normally don’t use in that way.
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Cool @Danny75 I hear what your saying for sure. Lets take the notion of simple and discard it….and start framing guitar things into ; I’d like to do it, I am working on it, I do it reflexively. By adopting this mindframe the ticking of the clock is removed and in doing so frustration, and foxhole mentality that prevents the full bloom of the creative mind gets put away. Now for the physical training of the fingers. Slow way down. Your observation regarding the continued use of those muscles tendon and ligaments is 100% spot on. Slowing down to a point where your mind and your muscle connect… to the point of precise execution….. is where your sweet spot is. I have had to go as slow as 30 bpm at times in order to get my fingers and brain to align. That is one beat (1/4 note, the down stroke) every 2 seconds or 1/8 note every 1 second (the up strokes too). If you get to this place of precision then you can work on accuracy. Accuracy involves repeating over and over so that the sound is the same. Without precision, I found myself chasing accuracy and never being able to catch it. Once you have nailed down precision and accuracy at a given speed that is when the exercise of increasing speed begins. In the beginning you are learning how hard you need to press the strings to make the sound you desire. It is why the slower speed is so important. (This is the phase where you get to explore and manage your physical and mental tension. It is something everyone has and the more you manage your playing away from it the faster you will progress.) This is one of the first skills that became intuitive for me, but only after I had figured out how to calibrate fingers and brain through the above process. By employing this method I was able to progress at a pace that surprised me. Without it I would work for months to get a song in the midst of frustration. When I started to slow down and go through it first for Precision, then Accuracy, then Speed I was rewarded with a most satisfying progress. Hopefully you can put some of this to use and find the same. Give it a shot and let us (forum folks) know how/if it helps or not.
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I will keep at it and report back in. Thanks for words of wisdom, Jeff. Much appreciated.
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<div>Danny, you said, “its not a natural motion…” And you are correct! The natural motion for our hands is to grasp. Our fingers naturally want to move as a unit. Guitar practice is like touch typing – it takes time and repetition. No instant gratification!</div>
About the hand pain, I can only recommend you go to the Skills Couses and go through Tony’s stretches. It works! Stretch a little before each session.
Keep going on the 30 Day course! Do not stay on a lesson more than 2 days. Keep progressing. Do not try to get the lesson down perfectly – you won’t. You need to first understand the concept being taught. Print off the tab for the lesson, and try to play through one note at a time. Then go to the practice video and reduce it to 50%. You are going for accuracy, not speed. Speed comes with time. You may find that after 10-20 minutes your playing gets worse. No worries! Fatigue is setting in. Stop and put the guitar up for a while. Come back later in the day and do a 10 minute refresher. the next day, before you begin the next lesson, go through the previous day’s lesson as a warm up. Then on to the next lesson.
In the 30 day course, Tony will teach you basic techniques, timing, and TWO CHORDS. I have been playing over 50 years, and found the 30 day course extremely helpful, as it showed me techniques I never tried, and broke a few bad habits. It felt like starting from scratch. I did not get any lesson down perfectly. I still have to go back and practice blues bass runs and scales to keep them fresh. You are looking for progress, not perfection at this point. Keep going!
Your next skill course should be My Next 6 Chords. This will help increase your dexterity and give you the chords to play along to a whole bunch of songs. Give each lesson a day or two and move on. After that go on to the Daily Challenges. And remember, they are CHALLENGES. I frequently flub my way through Monday and Tuesday, and do better the rest of the week, but the challenges have expanded my flexibility and have helped me to understand what really good guitarists are doing to sound that good. I may not be able keep up with them, but it is no longer a mystery.
On last thing. The daily challenges will expand your technique tool box. Try to teach yourself a new song every month. This will help keep things fresh. As Chet Atkins told Tommy Emmanuel, First, learn the melody. Next learn the chords. After that you can add to it to make it your own.
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I had a hard time getting a guitar to sit comfortably and went through a few different seats (and guitars) in the course of trying to work it out. The couch is too low. The stool is too high. I felt like Goldilocks trying to find the one that was just right, and then I got a simple folding chair with a flat seat and straight back, and boom — I could finally find some agreement with the guitar on how we ought to sit.
Some people prefer to stand and play with the guitar strapped on, and I tried that, but some shoulder issues cause my fingers to go numb pretty quickly that way, so unfortunately that one’s out for me. It might be good for you, though. Basically, just keep trying different things until it clicks into place for you.
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Hi Danny. If we changed names we would both be in the same place ! I have felt that I have made little progress in over a year as I don’t practice on a regular basis. As stated by someone else , just don’t give up, take a small break and keep at it !
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Thank you for all the advice and words of encouragement. I am definitely going to stick it out and it’s good to know I am not alone in my ineptitude! hehe
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You have all the advice you need above. Believe me I share your frustration at my fingers not doing what I want but from a different perspective. I’m a keyboardist so I can pretty much play anything I want on piano but starting to learn guitar this year my left hand was sooooo slow and clunky at fretting and getting both hands in tandem… nightmare. But I have put in the hours and bit by bit it is starting to happen. If you click on my profile and check my play for us vids you’ll see that progress is happening. You will get there if you are consistent in practice and playing. Just don’t set unachievable targets in your own head. I love the journey as much as the destination. I’ve arrived at the first station now but there are plenty of stops still to come and that is the truly exciting part of all this.
Finally do come to the 90 day progress party on Jan 5th. I’ve been to the last two and it is great to meet other TAC members and also Tony live. The invites will be on this site soon. Kepp on rockin’ 🤟😎🎸
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Danny-
What you’re experiencing now- (yes….. temporarily🙃)- is perfectly NORMAL.
I’ve been thru it more times than I care to say– including very recently- and I’m working back thru it BECAUSE of the help from friends here in your/our TAC family!
Give yourself some credit. “Learning to play guitar” period is not an easy task, and it’s also impossible to define, because we all have different starting points….. and end goals. As time goes by, your own personal playing habits and style and sound will lead you where you want to go– almost automatically.
My dumb-guy analogy: If you are a golfer, you know that EVERY golfer’s swing is just a little different from others– but the end result over time is that they get the ball down the fairway however works best for them. Remember– there are FAR more similarities than differences in their swings- but each IS just a little bit different, based on their own abilities and goals. To me– just like guitar. Those shots “right down the middle” may have been only once in a while at the start, but over time, they come more often. And when they DO– man it feels great!
Again— just like guitar….
You have some very wise and detailed advice already here from some VERY caring and experienced sources; I certainly cannot offer any better.
My own tip— Read thru the posts here TWO OR THREE TIMES. Pick them apart. There is wise, experienced, help– both on the surface— and between the lines- (as things apply to your own journey).
And just keep playin’!!!!
Mark J
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