TAC Family Forums

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  • Strumming through the trials

    Posted by Alfred on June 23, 2021 at 1:26 am

    Last week Wednesday while at work I got a call from my brother who lives in VA letting me know that my mother was taken to the hospital with possible heart failure from a Wednesday church service.

    I am the closest kid my folks have geographically, so I left work to go to the hospital, and was shocked to get there and find my mother in an induced coma and on a breathing machine. She had congestive heart failure mixed with bacterial pneumonia. Dad was obviously a wreck, and I got him home. She just woke from her coma today, thank God, and we got to talk to her. Because of covid, we still can’t go see her, but she is on the mend.

    My Dad can’t drive himself and my niece, who is a live-in care giver for my folks has 7 kids and can’t leave on the second if something happens, so I have been spending my days at my Dad’s (from 8am-11pm)….

    I haven’t done a single daily exercise this week, but I have spent a lot of time playing guitar and ukulele with my Dad. That has been a great stress reliever for him, and he even came on an open mic on Friday night (though the equipment left something to be desired). Every time he seemed to be getting too stressed, off we went to the music room to play for a while. My kids came with me and my daughter played with us often, and took over ukulele lessons for the younger kids to keep them busy.

    I think if guitar wasn’t something we had in common things would have been more difficult for him emotionally. We even went so far as to go to my Aunt’s house to play songs for her that my uncle used to. My uncle passed in December, and she was very happy to have us play for her and has asked us to come play once a month.

    It wasn’t until this year with all the tragedy and stress that I realized just how important guitar is to my family culture, and always has been to my elders.

    Anyway long thread, thought I would share what the guitar can do for an entire family, even for those that just listen and sing along.

    Alfred replied 3 years, 7 months ago 10 Members · 10 Replies
  • 10 Replies
  • Loraine

    Member
    June 23, 2021 at 4:26 am

    @Alfred Thank you for sharing this with us. I think having such a strong family connection and having the guitar in common is such a great thing. I’m glad your mom is on the mend. This must be such a stressful time for the entire family, but I think it is wonderful that you’re able to be there for your mom and dad during these difficult times. It was such a pleasure meeting your dad, Bob, and hearing him play for us during the VOM.

    Hang in there, and you and your family will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers.

  • SoCal_Ian

    Member
    June 23, 2021 at 5:19 am

    Ah yes, the sweet and sour of life. I’m glad to hear it’s leaning back to the sweeter side @Alfred. The guitar has certainly been a good friend to me during difficult times. It must be great to share that with family. Of course your dad was on one of the first VOMs I’ve missed in over a year. Sorry to have missed that. Hang in there man, I’ll be thinking good thoughts for you and yours.

  • Bill_Brown

    Member
    June 23, 2021 at 7:07 am

    Hi @Alfred , sorry to hear about your mom, my thoughts and prayers to you and your family. I think it’s wonderful that your family has that musical connection. I think when your mom does get home, that listening to you, your dad and daughter play together, will help her recover more quickly

  • Marty73

    Member
    June 23, 2021 at 8:01 am

    Yes @Alfred life does get in the way and sometimes it sucks! Keep doing what you are doing and I will keep your mom in my prayers. 🧐🧙‍♂️😎

  • Marquita

    Member
    June 25, 2021 at 11:27 am

    @Alfred – This is a tough season for seniors especially and I’m sorry your family is going through this. I will be praying for her recovery. It’s good to have resources of comfort 🎸 during times like these.
    I’ll be out of town for a week without access to the site but plan to check in as soon as I am home on 7/3. Take care and I wish you and your family well.

  • AttyTJ

    Member
    June 27, 2021 at 2:34 pm

    May you and all be well, soonest, @Alfred

  • BrianSantos

    Member
    June 27, 2021 at 2:58 pm

    Hi @alfred, today is the first I have heard about your challenging life event. So sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you, your mom, your dad and the rest of your family. It’s an important and powerful comfort that you can share your music in such a wonderful way. Thanks for sharing! Yes, keep strumming.

  • Alisa

    Member
    June 27, 2021 at 5:37 pm

    I am sorry to hear about your mom, I hope she will recover soon. It is wonderful that guitar playing is playing a healing role here, there is something magical about making music together, we connect on a level that words can’t reach. Thank you so much for sharing this personal story, I’m sure it will bring strength and ideas for constructive coping for many people who read it.

  • Jill_M

    Member
    June 27, 2021 at 5:41 pm

    Thinking and hoping for your mom’s recovery. Take care @Alfred. I am so glad the guitar is helping.

  • Alfred

    Member
    June 29, 2021 at 1:09 pm

    Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers. Yesterday my mother was moved from the hospital to a convalescent center, where she will be for a couple of weeks before she can come home. I am back home and headed back to work tonight. Mom is on the mend and Dad is a lot less distraught, and has a couple of projects to distract him in the form of some songs we are trying to learn to play together in parts.

    While I played a lot with Dad during this, I didn’t do much in the way of practice so now I can pick my routine back up and keep plugging away at new skills. New skills were definitely secondary to helping Dad through this, and playing familiar songs a lot was a good salve for him.

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